How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I think my nap took me to another dimension
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