what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
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