I skipped work to stalk him.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize