let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Less talking, more tequila
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
