quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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