Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
