She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
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