Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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