he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
