I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Of course I have a pirate flag
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
