i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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