That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
He better not be in your backpack
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
