He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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