I think I died a long time ago.
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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