I want to stick my p in your. b.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize
