that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
He has the fingertips of a God
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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