Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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