Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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