So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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