the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
i now understand why vodka
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Randomize
