I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
