You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Randomize
