He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
