so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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