Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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