very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
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