She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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