Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
