I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
