Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
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