New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
