Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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