she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize