just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
