I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
