My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
