I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
