Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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