Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize
