I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
you would pick up someone in the library
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
