Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I'm determined to sit on that face.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
