the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
