singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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