is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
