So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
