I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
