Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
