Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
