Hey man sorry I got all grabby
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
you will always have a special place in my vag
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Randomize