Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
